Faptuary - Celebrity nude scenes, high definition media and bad decisions - Page 28

Catherine Walker Naked – A Dark Song – Blu ray

The movie teases you so much with displaying Catherine Walker naked, dangling that boob-shaped carrot in front of you only to yank it away every time, that when it actually gets to the nude scene, ironically, you don’t believe it’s happening. Right at the beginning of the film, there’s talk about Catherine’s character, Sophia, having to perform sex magic, there’s a million suggestions of her getting naked, she has to undergo a ritual where she gets dunked in a bathtub multiple times, and there’s even a frozen-shower-down-the-back scene à la Jennifer Lawrence’s Russian spy torture scene in Red Sparrow. Yet she’s dressed through all of that.

Then the actual nude scene rolls around, and the build-up to that gets teased out as well. The creepy magician tells her to prepare herself, there’s a scene where she’s applying makeup, and she stands in front of him for a while, looking nervous at the prospect having to be naked. And so you, the viewer, assume that there will be no actual nude scene. Even as she pulls her shirt up, you’re sure that there is no incoming nudity. You’ve been burned before. You’re not falling it this time.

Well, more fool you, because the Catherine Walker nude scene you’ve been waiting for all movie has finally materialized. She pulls her top up over her head, glorious breasts in full view, and stands there, facing both the camera and the creeper that’s jerking off furiously, on full display. OK, I’m getting a bit ahead of myself. The camera does cut off above her crotch, so there is, very sadly, no full frontal nudity here, but what is within frame is on full display. In fact, the scene is surprisingly gratuitous considering how coy the rest of the movie is with showing Catherine Walker naked.

She does very shyly cover up her pubic region with her hands at one point, but since said pubis is off screen, a portion of the magic (pun intended) is sadly lost, and more importantly, we’ll never know whether she rocks the full bush or not. She turns around for a bit, giving us a slightly blurry shot of sideboob, and then she bends over and spreads her ass cheeks to show fapping dude her labia. Before you ask, yes, that entire last clause happens off-screen. I’m sorry too. But instead, you do get some nice shots of a geezer spunking into his pants.

If you happen to be a connoisseur of forced stripping scenes and embarrassed nude females, as I believe the subgenre is so descriptively called, this is likely the best Catherine Walker nude scene you can fap to. If you’re interested in branching out, however, you can check out her nude debut in Conspiracy of Silence, catch her in the fourth season of Strike Back, known individually as Shadow Warfare, see her topless in Patrick’s Day, spot some nips in The Delinquent Season, and finally, for the desperate masochists among you, test your vision be catching the brief nipslip in one of the 19 episodes of Versailles that she appears in. Or, if you want to just stick to what’s under hand (no, not your penis; the other hand), enjoy Catherine Walker naked in A Dark Song.

UPDATE: Greetings to everyone on this lovely summer’s day. I was looking back on this scene, and my first thought was, “Good Lord, my color correction her was absolutely abysmal.” I have atoned for my sins by redoing the color correction. If you are coming onto this page having visited it before and wondering if and why it looks different, now you know. If this is your first time, steady on and enjoy the Catherine Walker nude gallery below.

Andrea Riseborough Naked – Bloodline – HD Stream

This isn’t the first time you’ve seen Andrea Riseborough naked, but I guarantee it’s the best. If that happens to not be true, you’re clearly an expert paparazzo that’s taken photos of her spreading her pussy lips wide open with her insides visible to the throat, in which case, please share with me. I can pay you in kind. By which I mean I’ll send you positive energy over the internets. No refunds. Until then, I maintain this remains the greatest Andrea Riseborough nude scene of all time.

Andrea Riseborough plays Evangeline “Eve” Radosevich in Bloodline, a Netflix series that isn’t especially notorious for getting its female cast nude, and this is a series that features Chloë Sevigny, an actress whose boobs probably have more screentime than her face. And in spite of this typical Netflix deficit, out of fucking nowhere, there’s this minutes-long scene of an utterly, completely naked Andrea Riseborough. And gentlemen, I must tell you, she rocks the full bush. Trimmed for neatness, sure, but no landing strip nonsense or anything like that.

So the reigning queen of all Andrea Riseborough nude scenes begins with her reclined in a bed completely naked. And I do mean completely naked. No wretched merkins make an appearance here. She rolls around in the bed a bit, giving us good looks at her tits and her pubic hair. She eventually stands up and does a very feline stretch. Or so it seems. Maybe I just see it that way because of the catgirl post I covered yesterday. She very kindly does a 360 degree slow rotation with her arms over her head, so we get to have a very good view of every square inch of her naked body.

The latter half of the scene has a lot of great shots of Andrea Riseborough topless. We see her boobs from the front, from the back, and of course, the patrician’s angle, the sideboob. Anyone who’s seen the actress in other movies she’s been in knows that she has a bit of a penchant for adopting all sorts of different styles. The one she goes for in this series is the trailer trash meth addict look, which is sort of like the old heroin chic from the 90s, but with even less glamor. A lot of people may not be into that – and I’ll be honest, I prefer her when she’s looking like she doesn’t smell like pee – but there is something slightly alluring about the aura she goes for here. Or maybe that’s just my brain on boobies talking.

So if you want to see Andrea Riseborough’s ass, breasts, bush, and everything both beyond and in between, you’ve got it right here in Bloodline. The closest alternative we have that you can consider Fapsmith-approved is W.E., a movie about how the King of the British Empire was a simp who gave up his titles as the most powerful monarch in the world for a side of pussy. Well, if nothing else came out of that, it inspired a movie that involved Andrea Riseborough naked in her first ever full frontal nude scene, which has only now been followed and bettered by this one. Remember to think of King Edward VIII while you fap to this. It’s for the best.

Lily-Rose Depp Naked – Wolf – 4K Stream

I love a good nude debut, which is why today we’ve got Lily-Rose Depp naked in Wolf. In it, she plays a catgirl. Yes, anime is now real. Or, if you want to look at it from a less appealing perspective, you can say that she starred in a furry porn. Strangely, I’m not even complaining. Considering how shy she’s been about getting naked on screen, I’ll take any nudity from her, no matter the level of aberration. And we do get some damn good views here.

This is significant since the only other film one could say that we see Lily-Rose Depp naked in, she is technically topless, but she’s covering her boobs with her hands. That’s not to say you can’t squeeze a desperate fap out of it. She does look absolutely magnificent as she backpedals with a cheeky shy smile on her face and no clothes. But now, we don’t need to anymore. If you’re one of those masochists that likes the tease, the movie in question is A Faithful Man, or as it’s known in French, L’homme fidèle. I hope you like subtitles.

So as we can see, Wolf remains the only movie to host a proper Lily-Rose Depp nude scene. Or three. It’s a matter of perspective. They all sort of follow one another. In the first instance, her character, the girl who thinks she’s a cat, draws cat whiskers on her face and goes to see her boyfriend, the wolf, who’s chained up and in a cage. She then takes her clothes off, as everyone does when in this exact situation. We get some sideboob action, but unfortunately, the scene is quite dark, and even with color correction, it’s not the most graphic of scenes.

This is made up for in the next scene, where we see Lily-Rose Depp topless while she’s lying on her back. Her nipples are hard as diamonds as she holds dogboy’s hand while they sleep together naked. It’s not completely clear whether an off-screen sex scene occurred or not. The prison bars don’t really seem like that much of an impediment unless the guy in the movie thinks he’s a wolf because he’s hung like one. Lily-Rose is a bit out of focus in this scene, sadly, but the camera pans up and then down again, during which she sits up and comes slightly more into focus.

The final scene is my favorite, and unless she does a full frontal any time soon, will likely remain the best Lily-Rose Depp nude scene for a long time. She’s naked and sitting in a bathtub, but check this out: The camera is still, she’s not moving, her tits are in perfect view, there’s nothing in the way, the lighting is perfect, and the scene even lasts a whole lot of seconds. It’s unusual for me to edit a scene that requires so little color correction for maximum fappability. So there you have it. If you can get past the fact that she looks like her dad Johnny Depp in the face – or alternatively, if you like imagining Johnny Depp with boobs – enjoy Lily-Rose Depp naked in Wolf.

Anna Maxwell Martin Naked – The Night Watch – HD Stream

Anna Maxwell Martin naked with her full bush and pussy lips on display is definitely the shining moment of The Night Watch for me. Even if you’ve had a crush on Claire Foy forever and have been rightfully disappointed in what has, as I write, been her only nude scene, you’d be well within your right to be overjoyed that Claire gets properly naked with her boobs on full display here, but this holds no candle to the full frontal nudity we get from Anna. Even the other Anna, Anna Wilson-Jones, who is exceptionally difficult to spot naked but does get a nice nude scene in this film, only gets some nips out and for just a few flashes and they’re questionably blurred out in the close-ups.

Admittedly, The Night Watch isn’t the only film where we can see Anna Maxwell Martin naked. She has an explicit unsimulated sex scene in Line of Duty when DCS Patricia Carmichael pegs Arnott with a studded dildo for not doing a ridiculous enough fake Essex accent. Outside of that, we have two topless scenes. The first is in White Girl, by coincidence another BBC production, where we see Anna Maxwell Martin crying naked in the bathroom. Lighting is poor, and while nips do appear, the scene is about as far from explicit as you can get without her being encased in a space suit.

There’s another bona fide Anna Maxwell Martin nude scene in the Channel 4 adaptation of Poppy Shakespeare, which came out exactly three weeks after White Girl, but I’m told it’s short and not exceptionally fappable. I may get proven wrong when I have my own look at it very soon, but until then, I’ll have to take my shady informants at face value. Finally, she kind of sort of has a pube shot in the episode of Accused that she appears in, but the look is hardly great, to the point where we can’t even be completely sure what we’re looking at. There’s sideboob in that as well, but no nipple visible, therefore not a valid nude scene in my book.

With all the disappointments out of the way, let’s talk about where we actually do get a great view of Anna Maxwell Martin topless. Well, much more than topless, we see all there is to see. The scene starts as a door opens, followed by her emerging from behind it. She is completely naked at this stage. Just to be clear, we’re talking about no clothing, no merkins, no tactical props to block the view, no frustrating camera angles that don’t show us the good bits. She is completely nude and remains so for the rest of the scene. She walks across the room, sits down on a bed, acts pensive for a few seconds – one can only assume to prolong the amount of time she’s completely nude on screen with everything on show – and then gets under the covers.

We then get the beginnings of the only Anna Maxwell Martin lesbian sex scene in existence, but unfortunately, the fappability of this is limited to a nip flashing for a few frames as her sideboob peeks out from under the sheets while she rolls over to her side. Claire Foy is her partner for this scene, but sadly, no nudity from Claire here. In summary, we have visible labia, all natural bush, hard nipples, and with the spot of color correction I’ve done, what amounts to a well-lit view of Anna Maxwell Martin naked.

Claire Foy Naked – The Night Watch – HD Stream

As always, the BBC surprises us by making a dramatic period piece that by pure coincidence gives us the best ever view of Claire Foy naked. The Night Watch has quite a good offering of nude scenes from multiple actresses. This is the only scene where we see Claire Foy naked, but we do see her technically undressed in her nude scene in the bathtub with Anna Wilson-Jones, who does get naked in that one. We also get a jaw-droppingly amazing full frontal nude scene from Anna Maxwell Martin, and let me tell you, she rocks the full bush in all its glory.

We don’t really get to see Claire Foy nude much outside of this movie. She has only one other proper nude scene, and that’s from the ITV/BBC Two miniseries White Heat. In that one, Claire’s nips are visible, but it’s not particularly explicit or gratuitous. For starters, the lighting’s not great, there’s a naked dude’s body in the way half the time, and she’s covering her tits with her arms the other half of the time. Curiously, The Night Watch precedes that series by a year, making this her first ever nude scene, so I’m not entirely sure why she wound down so severely before never doing a nude scene again.

For those who say we get to see Claire Foy nude in The Girl in the Spider’s Web, my answer to that is a simple no. Well, not in any way that’s going to leave any true fapper properly satisfied anyway. Another common reference is that to Claire’s huge breakout as a lead, all the way back in Pulse. Well, I like shower scenes and sideboob as much as anyone, more even, but if there are no nipples visible, it’s not a nude scene unless there’s something more down below, which, I’m sorry to say, is not the case in Pulse. The big thing as I write is of course whether we’ll see Claire Foy nude in A Very British Scandal. I’m going to save you the trouble and just tell you no.

So for all these reasons, we should all be really grateful that we get to ogle Claire Foy topless in The Night Watch. Yes, the scene is extremely short, but if you’re happy to either watch the money shots on loop, as we have above, or stare at freeze frames of the best parts, as we have below, you can frankly get a lot more mileage out of this one than out of the much longer one in White Heat. The entire content of the scene involves Claire stripping off her nightgown, exposing her breasts, and trying on a pajama top given to her by Anna Maxwell Martin’s character.

By the way, if you have any fantasies of Claire Foy in lesbian relationships, you’ll get not one, but two, in this film. In fact, each of her nude scenes, both this one and the one where we don’t get a money shot from her, are in sexually-charged situations with her lesbian lovers, played by Anna Maxwell Martin and Anna Wilson-Jones, respectively. That’s enough meandering waffle for now. We’ve clearly established that the best way to see Claire Foy nude is in The Night Watch, and all the color corrected caps from that are below. Fap on and prosper!