I was surprised when I got an eyeful of Daniella Pineda naked when watching Mr Roosevelt a few days ago. It’s not often that I get blindsided by a nude scene. I pride myself on something that approaches an encyclopedic knowledge of film and television nudity, and yet this one surprised me, pleasantly of course. I had originally picked up Mr Roosevelt because I was aware that it contained the only ever nude scene from Noel Wells. That turned out to be multiple nude scenes from the star, but more than that, I learned, dick in hand, that the same movie also contains the only known Daniella Pineda nude scene in existence.
It was actually quite satisfying. Early on in the movie, we think we’re going to see Daniella Pineda naked when she takes her top off to get changed. Unfortunately, the camera is at the wrong angle and we just get a whole lot of back. Not even sideboob is visible. Just back. In retrospect, the whole thing has a sort of burlesque quality to it. It’s that infamous tease that everyone has a love-hate relationship with. But here is why it works out. First you think that you are about to get the Daniella Pineda nude scene that you’ve been waiting for so long. Then you realize that you are, in fact, not. Then, out of the fucking blue, boom, tits.
So the point where we finally get to see Daniella Pineda nude is partway through the movie. It overlaps with the biggest part of Noel Wells’ nude scenes, namely, the deliciously long scene where the protagonists are at the watering hole or river or reclaimed toxic waste dump. The movie had already established at this point that Daniella’s character is not at all fussed about public nudity, so it was not an abnormal progression to the story when she took her top off to enjoy the sun. What does surprise the viewer – or, at least, it did surprise me – is when, as the free-spirited character is taking her bikini top off, the camera stays firmly pointed on her titties.
Daniella Pineda, hot day, bikini top removed – if that’s not the recipe to a perfect day, I don’t know what is. Just to be clear, if the images on this page don’t paint a clear enough picture, the director – who, incidentally, is Noel Wells herself – was exceptionally generous with the gratuitousness of this nude scene. The lighting is exemplary, which I suppose isn’t surprising considering it’s set outdoors on a sunny day. The camera angles are absolutely uncompromising. We get multiple camera angles, and not a single one of them is stingy with how much nudity it captures. Honestly, the only thing missing here is a 4K UHD blu ray release, which would probably break the internet (and my wang).
If you’d to this point resigned yourself to searching for Daniella Pineda sexy photos because you didn’t think there was anything better, Merry Christmas. To be fair, it wouldn’t have taken much research to get to the conclusion that this nude scene exists. It’s the problem with just accepting for so long that an actress has never done a nude scene – you don’t try to look for one. Although she’s never been in the Mickey Mouse Club or whatever, the public image that she’s been cultivating for so long has just drilled it deep into my head that we will never see Daniella Pineda nude. More fool me, but at least I got a late present that I wasn’t expecting.
If you’ve been hunting high and low for some Daniella Pineda ass, though, I have bad news for you. She keeps her bikini bottoms on throughout this scene. You do get a fair bit of sideass, though. I don’t know if ass men enjoy sideass as much as boob men enjoy sideboob, but it’s there if you want it. If that doesn’t appeal to you, there is still that other video of her spreading her ass cheeks wide open. In any event, you will so more of Daniella Pineda nude in this movie than anywhere else.
Right up until a Daniella Pineda porn film comes out. I mean, there was this one… but… It’s actually interesting how gratuitous this nude scene of hers is considering how averse to nudity she is in everything else she has been in. Do we get a whole lot of cleavage from her in TBS’s The Detour? Sure, but cleavage will only ever be only partial boobs, and let’s be honest, it was TBS, which means that there were never going to be any nude scenes. The situation with American Odyssey was not dissimilar. Yes, she was technically naked in it, but again, NBC production means no nipples on screen. Curse you, Tipper Gore, and your puritanical ways.
Something that we can probably all agree would have benefited from the inclusion of Daniella Pineda topless is Netflix’s adaptation of Cowboy Bebop. God forbid Netflix should stoop to something as lowbrow as nude scenes in their productions. A Faye Valentine lesbian sex scene? Yeah, that’s perfectly wholesome and family-friendly. But a hint of nip!? No, that would be the work of the Devil. The joke is clearly on Netflix since they ended up having to cancel the show. But the funny thing is that that’s not even the full picture. The show did have nudity, but it was just always a sort of background affair, and what everyone was blatantly obviously interested in was seeing Daniella Pineda nude.
In spite of all of those disappointments, you can bring your desperate, last-ditch search for Daniella Pineda leaked nudes to an end, because you can get the full enchilada from Mr Roosevelt, courtesy of director Noel Wells. I have mused countless times about how female directors direct the best nude scenes, including in the last post, so I won’t bore everyone to tears by repeating it all again here. Instead, brush the Cheeto dust off your hands, unzip your trousers, and enjoy the glory of Daniella Pineda nude.
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