Boobs Nude - Page 29

NEWS: Will We See Lily James Nude in Pam & Tommy?

First of all, yes, that is Lily James on the left as Pamela Anderson – and if you live under a rock, that is also Lily James nude from The Exception on the right. That film came out in 2016, and as I write, it remains the last nude scene than the actress has done. Furthermore, if you don’t count the very brief flash of nip in Secret Diary of a Call Girl, it’s the only nude scene she’s ever done. Now I’ve been hearing rumors that that trend will be ending on February 2, when Pam & Tommy releases on Hulu, Disney+, and Star+ (depending on where you live). I’ve done a bit of research on the topic since waiting those 3 weeks for a definite answer just seems too long. It’s complicated, but I think fairly clear.

Meet Marissa Hoffman. She’s got a role in Pam & Tommy, she’ll be in front of the camera, but you probably wouldn’t recognize her. In fact, in situations like these, it tends to be hit-or-miss whether she’ll even be in the rolling credits at the end of the episodes. I assume you’ve all already figured out where this is going. It’s been reported by numerous news sources, including the UK’s most famed purveyor of truth and purely objective journalism, that Marissa Hoffman will be Lily James’ body double for her sex scenes with Sebastian Stan, who is playing Tommy Lee. It’s not clear whether Sebastian Stan will be using a body double as well, but unconfirmed rumors suggest that this role will be filled by Morgan Freeman.

But that’s just for the sex scenes, right? We’re totally gonna be seeing Lily James naked left, right, and center in a bunch of steamy topless scenes that don’t involve sex, right? Well, said scenes might exist, and they might be done without a double, but before you get too excited, I’d like to draw your attention to the picture of Lily James in the red swimsuit in character. Notice anything? Nothing, are you sure? What about if you go back to the picture of her bare tits at the top of the post and compare? Lily James’ boobs are B cups. In the swimsuit picture, they’re DD cups. But how can this be? She hasn’t had any breast augmentation surgery (and Lily, if you’re reading this, please never do), so what gives? The answer is prosthetics, a chest piece, as reported by the UK’s most serious and high class source of news.

The above image is from The Exception too. Sorry, I thought I might close off on a good note. Although, all that said, the chest piece will only be covering her breasts, and she hasn’t said anything about wearing a prosthetic pussy, so for all we know, we might get a 4K close-up of her spread open vagina. I mean, I’m not saying that we will, but we might. Hope was the last thing to come out of Lily’s Box, after all. Or was that Pandora?

Bethany Orr Naked – Excess Flesh – Blu ray

As I write, there’s only one film in which we can see Bethany Orr naked, and this is it. Excess Flesh is a sweet and delightful little psychological thriller, the virtues of which I extolled when I covered the scenes in which we see co-star Mary Loveless naked. In the interest of brevity, I won’t be repeating what I’d said in that post, so either go read that (and fap to Mary Loveless while you do) or simply watch the movie, which, if you enjoy the genre at all, is a pretty damn good watch, with or without the revolving door of nude scenes in it.

I’m going to just plop here, to clear any confusion nice and early, that the lovely and talented actress is also known as Effie Lavore, which she goes by in social media and the like. In all her projects to date, she has been credited as Bethany Orr, except for her earliest projects, where she was credited as B. Love Orr. For those struggling to make the connection, her full name is Bethany Love Orr, so Lavore is a phonetic truncation for her Love and Orr. I’ll be referring to her as Bethany Orr in this article not out of disrespect, but purely because that’s what she’s credited as in the movie this is covering. My gratitude goes out to the gentlemen and scholars over at IMDB for collating all of this information, meaning I could spend less time researching and therefore more time fapping, as God intended.

With the exception of the first nude scene, one quite early in the movie, you do have to strain your eyes a bit to properly catch Bethany Orr naked in it. Not unlike with the Mary Loveless nude scenes, the nudity in Excess Flesh isn’t especially gratuitous. I rarely say this because in 99% of films, it’s simply untrue, but in Excess Flesh, the nudity seems to genuinely be for artistic purpose rather than solely to sell tickets and blu rays. That said, director Patrick Kennelly has only included naked actors in one of his other projects, a music video, and… well, let’s just say that to call it gratuitous would be like calling Death Valley, California warm. If you’re interested, the full, uncensored video is up on Vimeo (it contains a lot of peepee; you’ve been warned).

Back to the Bethany Orr nude scenes, the first one appears about 6 minutes into the film, when her character Jill goes to weigh herself in her bathroom. Desperate to get that number as low as possible, she undresses before stepping onto the scale, leaving herself naked save for a pair of pink dotted panties with an adorable little bow. This is the most gratuitous of the nude scenes in the film and arguably the only one in which we get a long(ish), clear(ish), uninterrupted(ish) look at the good stuff. So get your faps in early, I guess.

After this first time we see Bethany Orr topless, the rest of the scenes are more dependent on some good old-fashioned video scrubbing to catch the money shots. The next time we see Bethany Orr nude, she actually is completely naked, and to be fair, a very large proportion of her shaved crotch gets screen time. If she didn’t go for the Brazilian wax/shave, there would certainly be a lot of bush on screen. Because she does, however, there’s no bush and no actual definable pussy lips visible, which in a way is the worst of both worlds. Still squeezed in a good fap to her upper crotch skin, though, and you can too if you try hard enough.

In what is the last nude scene of the film – and, quite poetically, extremely close to the end, like the first one was extremely close to the beginning – we get a lovely helping of Bethany Orr’s sideboob as she rampages around a kitchen. But wait, one does not rampage around a kitchen before cutting up one’s top, of course. So having done that, what’s left of her top often exposes her right boob as she flails around in a feast of nip slips to make even the Super Bowl proud (or explosively enraged; I forget what their reaction was).

So for those of you who can’t be bothered to scrub through the video for the nip flashes, Fapsmith has scrubbed for your sins, and you can enjoy the sacred moments of Bethany Orr nude – or, if you prefer, Effie Lavore nude – below.

Mary Loveless Naked – Excess Flesh – Blu ray

There’s only one movie in existence where we can see Mary Loveless naked, and luckily for us, it’s a pretty good watch. Excess Flesh premiered at South by Southwest in 2015, which incidentally is the same time and place that The Final Girls premiered, a movie perhaps most renowned for being the only film in which Malin Akerman appears but keeps her clothes on. In contrast, Excess Flesh has a healthy smattering of nude scenes, and they’re not limited to the lovely Mary Loveless either; we see her co-star Bethany Orr naked on more than one occasion.

Excess Flesh is a psychological thriller with two female leads, which has led at least one reviewer to compare it to Single White Female. Well, they weren’t far off, because if there’s one universal constant that must be maintained, it’s that every psychological thriller with female leads needs to have plenty of non-sexual nudity, and it was as true in the 90s as it is now. We see Mary Loveless naked quite a few times in the film. Now there’s something to be said for the fact that none of them shots are particularly lingering or gratuitous, but the magic of scrubbing through frame by frame can get us exactly what we’re after.

We see Mary Loveless nude about as many times as we see her in rather advanced states of undress. Without spoiling too much, the Los Angeles-based actress spends a large portion of the movie as a hostage, with large portions of that having her chained to a wall in her bra and panties and other such geometrically-limited clothing. The boob men might be a bit disappointed since her breasts don’t come into view too often, but the movie makes up for it in a way that, frankly, I’m still not entirely sure is what I think it is. We might get an actual pussy shot from behind, labia visible and all. Might. All you fapping detectives can play around with the color correction in that frame to see if you can confirm anything. It looks convincing enough, but also not clear enough to rule a modesty patch out.

The ass men among you are in for a treat since, pussy lips or not, we see Mary Loveless’ ass in more of her nude scenes than we don’t. The very first nude scene in the film, in fact, has her blacked out on her bed, bare-ass naked and mooning the camera with enough intensity to burn out its CMOS sensor. The next time we see Mary Loveless naked is the scene referred to earlier where her pussy lips may or may not be visible, and then the third time is yet another scene of her unconscious in bed while wearing conveniently no clothing.

For all the boob men waiting to see her tits, you’ll have to wait until the final third of the movie, where we see Mary Loveless topless for the first time as she’s being washed down in a bathtub. Her captor even makes a comment about her having nice nipples, but at this stage, we only see some peeks of areola from the bottom of the screen. It goes without saying I was quite surprised when after all of that teasing, we do indeed see her full tits while she’s struggling against the captor who’s attempting to drown her, being dragged out of the bathtub unconscious (I’m noticing a recurring theme here), and then dragged across a floor, still completely naked, of course.

Due to the fast movements in the topless scenes, there’s a fair bit of blur which washes out the actress’ nipples some, but with the magic of color correction, I’ve managed to salvage a lot of the subtler visual data for a clearer view. Screenshots of all the Mary Loveless nude scenes from Excess Flesh are below.

Kate Beckinsale Naked – Uncovered – HD Stream

There is only one film where we can see Kate Beckinsale naked. Yes, you guessed correctly that it’s Uncovered. So here’s some things you may not know. There is still no blu ray release, and the only media in which the movie was available was DVD (and VHS, if you’re a real masochist). Up until recently, that is. Yes, Uncovered is now available from streaming services, and it is available in HD. The aspect ratio now sits at an absolutely bizarre 5:3, but if you can look past that, what we have is pretty much sort of kind of basically 1080p. I’ve also color corrected the holy hell out of this, so we should be getting maximum detail in this post.

I’m actually going to admit that for all my mastery of all things to do with celeb nudity in film and television, I’d never seen this film before today. I’ve known about it forever, of course. I remember squinting to the blurry messes that were the VHS caps on the internet back in the very early 00s, and then busting more than a few nuts off to the DVD caps when they made the scene, but I just never took the plunge to do the work myself. What I’d seen was just so low-detail that it didn’t seem like I could do any meaningful color correction to it. It goes without saying that when I heard that it was now streaming in HD, I was keen to make up for my past sloth.

The first time we see Kate Beckinsale nude in Uncovered – or indeed ever – is when her former professor is making out with her on a couch. He pulls her shirt up and sucks vigorously on her nipple. The actor in this scene, one Art Malik, officially has the best ice breaker at parties after this. “Raise your hand if you’ve been paid money to suck on Kate Beckinsale’s breast. What, only me?” She then sneezes on him and takes off. That is, the character from the film, not the people at the hypothetical party. Hay fever is always such a cock blocker.

The next time we see Kate Beckinsale topless is when she’s undressing for a shower but decides – only after getting naked, of course – to examine her painting again. We see a very nice frontal shot of her nude body for a surprisingly long amount of time. No quick flashes here. I mean, flashing, yes, but by no means quick. When she gets really close to the painting, the director decides to not rob us of any nudity and gives us another naked shot in the reflection of the glass. What a swell guy. Later in the film, there’s a quick shot of a black and white photo of Kate Beckinsale naked in bed. Finally, towards the end of the movie, there’s a post-sex scene where she’s perched on the arm of a sofa, completely naked. We see some sideboob for a while, then she turns to face the camera, gives us a bit of frontal, stands up, and walks past the camera.

All in all, this movie is an absolute treat now that it’s out in HD. And by the way, to everyone who said that it sucks when you take out the nudity, I actually liked it. It wasn’t Shakespeare, but frankly, it’s all the better for it. A bit of 90s camp never hurt anyone. Also, if any of you fappers have a hairy armpit fetish, prepare to blow your loads even harder; that’s all I’m going to say. I’m going to leave you with one last parting piece of trivia before you all fap yourselves to death. Some of you may challenge that this is the only film in which Kate Beckinsale has been naked. You’d still be wrong. If you’re going to bring up Haunted, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but it has been confirmed that that was a body double. The sooner we can make peace with that, the sooner we can all spunk ourselves dry to the real Kate Beckinsale nude scene in the caps below.

Natalie Dormer Naked – Game of Thrones – 4K Blu ray

I still think about Natalie Dormer naked in Game of Thrones a lot. Falling asleep at night, I think of her naked. Bored at work, I think of her naked. Carrying a coffin at a loved one’s funeral, Natalie Dormer’s nude scene is playing out in from of my eyes. It’s like an obsession. This is quite possible my most treasured nude scene. It goes without saying my dick got more than a few flutters of blood pressure when the 4K UHD blu ray for Season 2 of Game of Thrones came out. The discerning among you will notice that the quality doens’t quite scale up as well compared to a normal 1080p blu ray, largely due to the H.265 codec not being quite as robust at the finest detail as H.264 was, but there is more detail in the 4K nonetheless.

Game of Thrones nude scenes are about a dime a dozen. At the same time, it’s no secret that the largest part of them were frontloaded into the first season. Indeed, Season 1 had a nude scene just about every episode, and half of the were from Emilia Clarke, who, as we know, was in the role of Daenerys Targaryen, a major character. In fact, she was probably the most major character, and she had her tits out in half the episodes. Then Season 2 began, and it was mostly over. It’s for that reason that Natalie Dormer’s introduction in the same season and the nude scene that followed were such welcome additions to the show. Unfortunately, this was the first and last on-screen nudity from her in the show. But enough negativity.

The first time we see Natalie Dormer nude in Game of Thrones is when she corners her gay husband Renly in a tent and undoes her dress, opening it up from the front, and letting it fall to the ground. Margaery Tyrell is aware that Renly is only into dudes at this point, so she’s very clearly flashing her tits to the audience, not to him. It’s logically inconsistent, but HBO do need to squeeze in the nudity one way or another, and they’re not going to let a passionless marriage of convenience stop them.

The rest of the scene plays out with Natalie Dormer topless throughout. It’s actually a marvel of good cinematography as far as fapping is concerned. We basically get a full front quadrant of boobage, from front on titty shots all the way to the very fappable sideboob. There’s even a point where the camera pans down from Margaery’s face to her crotch (while she’s topless, of course). Unfortunately, this movement is too quick, and even at very high-bitrate encoding, there’s a blur that was captured by the original camera and therefore impossible to overcome.

There is a sort of kind of Natalie Dormer sex scene in a later season where she’s getting it on with Tommen Baratheon, but, true to form for HBO past a first season, there’s no visible nudity in it. Even though she’s not quite Eva Green-tier in her nudity, there are still other films and shows to see Natalie Dormer naked in, including The Tudors, The Fades, Rush, The Scandalous Lady W, In Darkness, and if you think you can beat off to a minimal-resolution, black-and-white, rear shot of a woman who may or may not even be Natalie Dormer, Picnic at Hanging Rock. Overwhelmed? Then ignore all of that and enjoy Natalie Dormer nude in Game of Thrones below.