Pussy Nude - Page 8

Mariana Novak Naked – The Penal Colony – HD Stream

If you watched the new fourth season of Stranger Things this past week, you probably wanted to see Mariana Novak naked, even if it was only subconscious. The actress has a small role in the seventh episode as a nurse in the infirmary where Eleven and the other members of Junior Slipknot practice their superpowers. Although her character is not named beyond quite literally “Hawkins Infirmary Nurse”, she does have spoken lines, but most of all, I found myself captivated by her radiant beauty. As is always the case in situations such as these, my next move was to go onto Google Images and search for “mariana novak nude”.

I did indeed get a number of images of Mariana Novak nude. I wasn’t completely satisfied with the offerings, though. It’s nothing to do with the actress, of course. No, she is absolutely stunning. But the only Mariana Novak nude scenes available don’t offer quite the right arrangement of pixels to have an amazing fap to. She had a nude scene in Ozark, but even if you put aside how dark it is, the camera is mostly behind her, catching only a little bit of sideboob. Not enough for a seasoned fapper. The only other option is her nude scene in The Penal Colony. The camera is coming in from the right direction and there is plenty of full frontal nudity. The only problem is that it’s quite dark. Since I’m never one to back down from a challenge, I viewed it as my duty to color correct it to maximum fappability, and here we are.

We see Mariana Novak nude in The Penal Colony, where she plays Nadezhda Tolokonnikova from the Russian band Pussy Riot. Called Nadya in the short, it’s a clipped bio of the activist and her time in a Russian women’s prison. The film details a number of the abuses she experienced as well as those she witnessed, one of which was the prominent scene where a fellow inmate is forced to strip and work completely naked for falling behind. The Mariana Novak nude scene we get is as part of a group shower scene. It includes, as previously mentioned, full frontal nudity, and from Mariana, that means tits, trimmed pubic hair, and even visible labia. The full short is available to watch on the filmmaker’s Vimeo.

Suzanna Hamilton Naked – Nineteen Eighty-Four – Blu ray

Even though her career never quite managed to reach superstar status, I still view Suzanna Hamilton naked in Nineteen Eighty-Four as one of the defining moments of the 80s. This post is a shoutout to Space Cowboy, who hooked me up with some really goddamn impressive rare footage, which I can’t wait to process and post (more on that later). I did a fair bit more color correction on this one to push the limits of maximum fappability. The tightrope of color correction gets narrower the further you get, leaving you balancing between crisp, clear, light footage and that which is (relatively) free of both artifacts and wash-out of subtler details that get wiped when you’re too aggressive with grain removal. Pubes fall victim to the last issue most harshly, which is really unfortunate when you’ve got a full bush as majestic as the one this English rose is rocking.

“Can I have more uninteresting technical details, Fapsmith?” Of course you can, but no one else wants to read that, so I’ll waffle on around that topic no more. The only thing else I’ll say on it is the following. The source I used for this post is the newly remastered blu ray of Nineteen Eighty-Four. Without being too much of a Negative Nancy, I didn’t feel that this remaster gave us leagues of progress over what came before it. Personally, I think the digitization is suboptimal, which is strange considering I’m certain this movie was shot on quality film back in the 80s, so there should be no excuses like “the CMOS sensor was a bit crap.”

But you know, I really wanted to enjoy what I consider the best Suzanna Hamilton nude scene by far as best I could, so I worked with what was available. The remaster is better that its predecessor, even if it’s not by a country mile, so that certainly gives me a leg up in the process. The rest of it was just days of fine tuning. I feel like I have ended at the place where the tits and ass (or rather, tits and bush in this case) are of pretty damn good quality and the only significant artifacts and distortions are in the backgrounds. If I was working on a proper, serious restoration project, I could have cleaned all of that out too, but I can’t be bothered and no one’s fapping to the dirty wallpaper behind Suzanna Hamilton’s nude body anyway.

The only part of Suzanna Hamilton nude that may have taken a teeny, tiny bit of damage in the “correction” process is her regally leonine 80s bush. I assure you this is not by choice, and to prevent this would take me an exceptionally long time (though I’m not ruling out doing it if there is enough demand for it). The very short version of a very long story is that a degree of grain needs to be smoothed out for the details to be sharpened in way that doesn’t create hideous artifacts all over the place. I know it sounds like I’m just destroying detail to create detail, but believe me when I say the end result is a significant improvement in that department. Except for with pubic hair.

Yes, I did try my best to maintain the glory of the Suzanna Hamilton full frontal nude scene with as much of the original as possible, and if I may be so bold as to say, I think I did a passable job on the bush, but I won’t deny that some detail was lost in the process. If there is, once again, demand, I could release a complementary version of the work with scaled back, pube-preserving color correction, but y’all will just have to let me know if that’s what you want. If you want to build up some more public support on the matter, you can also leave a comment on this post or, of course, twat me at you-know-where.

So much for my promise to stick to talking about Suzanna Hamilton naked and not waffle too much about the technical aspects. Oh well. OK, so what do we have? Suzanna Hamilton gets nude in Nineteen Eighty-Four a lot. She plays Julie, who is a sex criminal (their term, not mine), so naturally this means there has to be tons and tons of nudity. The onslaught of Suzanna Hamilton nude scenes had nothing at all to do with selling tickets and home media, though. It was totally a completely artistic decision, which is why John Hurt’s dick has just as much screen time.

The first time we see Suzanna Hamilton naked is when she undresses out in a field. She’s wearing no bra or panties, so when she takes her dress-overalls-hybrid thing off, everything is on show. Yes, that includes the full bush. And who doesn’t enjoy a bit of public nudity. The rest of her nude scenes take place in a dingy room, which is apparently the most erotic site in the world of Airstrip One. She just kind of wanders around completely naked a lot (legendary). She also gets arrested while completely nude and beaten with a baton while completely nude. Yeah, it gets kinda dark toward the end. Anyway, do enjoy the painstakingly cleaned up screen captures of Suzanna Hamilton nude from Nineteen Eighty-Four below.

Lynsey Taylor Mackay Naked – Under The Skin – 4K Stream

Imagine you get your big break. It’s going to be a big budget movie with some big names involved. This is the breakthrough you’ve been waiting for. You have to do a full frontal nude scene with your labia completely on show, but you see it as a necessary way to break into the film industry. You do the scene, the movie comes out, and you find out that the same movie also contains multiple full frontal nude scenes from Scarlett Johansson. I imagine it’s like if your band gets signed to play a gig at a large venue, only to find out that Megadeth will be playing down the road at the exact same time.

Lynsey Taylor Mackay played the essential role of The Dead Woman in Under The Skin. I’m not just saying that because I forgot her character’s name. I’m saying that because that’s literally how she’s credited. The tragedy is that her performance, silent though it was, was perfect. What’s more, her naked body looks great. And yet, I guarantee you most people who watched Under The Skin more than a few months ago will have forgotten that she was even in it. Life is truly cruel. So I’ll do my part in immortalizing this performance by color correcting all the naughty bits to perfectly, fap-ready visibility. You’re welcome, struggling artists of the world.

For those that have forgotten this scene, it involves a completely nude Scarlett Johansson stripping Lynsey Taylor Mackay’s clothes off as… of, sorry, did I forget to mention that one of Scarlett Johansson’s nude scenes was overlapping with this one? So I suppose it’s less like Megadeth are playing down the road and more like they’re playing just to the left of you and everyone in the audience thinks you’re just a gaggle of roadies that didn’t get off stage fast enough. So unfair. So very unfair. Oh well. Such is life. I, for one, am thankful to Lynsey for gracing us with this nude scene and wish her all the success in the future. As for all of you readers, you know very well what it’s time for.

Ullie Birve Naked – Epsilon aka Alien Visitor – HD Stream

Is it weird that the only place where you can see Ullie Birve naked is in a PG-13 film? Is it even weirder that she has not one, not two, but a whole three full frontal nude scenes in said PG-13 film? Yes, it absolutely is, and I love it. PG-13 nudity is the best thing ever because it’s so natural, so seamless. These are the kinds of nude scenes that separate titty films from porn in the strongest way possible, and when the nude scenes in them are full frontal, all that much better. I’m talking about the film that was originally released in Australia in 1997 as Epsilon and worldwide as Alien Visitor.

So under what circumstances do we get graced with an Ullie Birve nude scene in this film? Well, the answer, naturally, is that she is an alien. That’s not an immigration comment; she is literally a literal alien from outer space. The fact that she looks exactly like a human woman is quite fortuitous for us when combined with that she doesn’t understand the point of wearing clothes. Until the other main character forces her to get dressed, she sort of just walks around naked everywhere. It’s funny because this reminded me of one of my favorite (for obvious reasons) tropes, so I decided to look up the Innocent Fanservice Girl trope on TV Tropes, and indeed, this very film is mentioned right in there as an example of it.

The somewhat bad news is that this nudity is “tastefully done”, so all in all, we get less than a minute of Ullie Birve nude in the truest, most visible sense on screen. I’m not complaining, of course, and the implied nudity lasts closer to 5 minutes, so if you can get your rocks off to that, then enjoy. The first proper nude scene is a bit of a taster. We see the Australian actress naked head to toe while standing in the middle of a desert. Unfortunately, this shot is from a fair distance, so details aren’t as great as can be. The positive here is that it is very well lit, which cannot be said for the rest of her nude scenes in the sci-fi film.

We’re then teased with many opportunities to see Ullie Birve topless at least, but alas, the camera cuts to above her nipples every time. At this stage, you would certainly be forgiven for thinking that the distant full frontal is the best you’re going to get, which makes what happens next that much more satisfying. In spite of being, once again, a PG-13 film, we get a shot of our alien visitor walking walking toward the camera completely naked and with everything on show. Allow me to qualify that. Not only do we get full bush. Yes, full hairy beaver. But we also get to marvel at her big tits as they bounce and sway to her walk.

Our naked alien visitor then gets forcibly dressed by Captain Cockblock, but don’t worry, this isn’t the end of it. She gets pissed off once she finds out that she is on Earth (understandable; I get angry every morning I wake up on this cursed planet), and begins destroying his camp. She’s only wearing a man’s shirt at this stage, so suffice it to say, her hairy pussy and ass make many an appearance as she thrashes about for half a minute. I know there are guys out there that love to see Australian celebs nude, so hopefully this obscure little piece of Outback cinema gives you that fix. Below are all the screencaps of Ullie Birve naked.

Scarlett Johansson Naked – Under The Skin – 4K Stream

Do you want to see Scarlett Johansson naked? Of course you do. Even if you’re a gay man or a straight woman, I know you want to see Black Widow nude. Everyone does. It’s one of the universal constants. The frustration for every human with a pulse, however, is that there is only one movie in existence in which we get a proper Scarlett Johansson nude scene. The good news is that said movie offers less one nude scene and about six million nude scenes. Truly nothing is impossible. I’m talking of course about Under The Skin, the 2013 film by Jonathan Glazer (extremely loosely) based on the 2000 novel of the same name by Michel Faber. Tragically, in the film adaptation, Scarlett doesn’t play a wolfgirl like she does in the books, so all you anime fans are going to be disappointed. That said, catgirl nudity is still on the menu if you look hard enough.

Now, you may think that the reason she’s been so shy about getting naked since Under The Skin came out is because you’re not supposed to see a Disney actress nude. It messes with Disney’s family-friendly image, which is a weird concept considering even Disney stars from literal children’s shows end up doing reams upon reams of nudity after the fact, Miley Cyrus being perhaps the most notable example, but by no means the only. Even so, that’s not the reason. Scarlett Johansson’s Black Widow has been a thing since Iron Man 2 came out all the way back in the glory years of 2010. But wait! Disney didn’t originally own Marvel Studios, so that’s irrelevant. Wrong in this situation. Disney bought out Marvel Entertainment in 2009, a year before the release of Iron Man 2 and the introduction of Scarlett Johansson as Black Widow. But when did Under The Skin come out?

The first time the world was blessed by seeing Scarlett Johansson nude was in 2014, when Under The Skin was released. Before someone calls me out on it, yes, technically the film first screened to audiences in 2013, but that was only if you happened to be at one of the major film festivals in which that happened. Everyone else had to wait until the following year. I do too remember waiting with bated breath for footage to finally emerge all those months, being sustained only by reports from lucky fappers that happened to be at one of the original screenings. It was a long wait, and then, to be honest, I was disappointed with the final release.

Scarlett Johansson, tits, trimmed bush, plenty of full frontal nudity – what could I possibly have been disappointed in? Well, for those who have seen the film, you’ve certainly noticed just how incredibly dark the nude scenes in it are. So if you’re sitting through it to fap to Scarlett Johansson naked, you might feel somewhat cheated. My problem back then was that I didn’t bother with color correction, and in fact, very few people did. Certainly the first offerings of the nude scenes from Under The Skin were only brightened or had the midtones boosted. Nothing more advanced than that, and sadly, it was not enough.

To get the full experience of enjoying Scarlett Johansson topless in Under The Skin, quite a lot of work has to go into it. Yes, it’s true that better attempts at color correcting these scenes have come about in the eight years since the movie met the general public, but I’ve still felt that none have really reached the kind of detail I need to minimally sustain my fap sessions. An oft-misattributed quote to Gandhi is “Be the change you want to see,” and while he didn’t actually say those words, if he had lived to witness the era of film and television nudity, I’m sure he would have. Gandhi liked titties. And I like detailed titties. This culminated in my own attempt at color correcting the nude scenes in Under The Skin so that I can actually get the best look at Scarlett Johansson naked possible (unless you’re Ryan Reynolds and you’ve gotten to see that heavenly body up close). The result (so far) is available all throughout this page. You’re welcome.

And Under The Skin really is the full package. If you’re after some Scarlett Johansson ass, it’s got you covered. If what would tickle you pink is close ups of Scarlett Johansson’s feet, then it’s got plenty of that too. Honestly, it’s unreal just how gratuitous the nudity in this movie is. And once you get some color correction done, it’s even visible. I don’t know if this has ever been confirmed or not, but I suspect that the really dark shots and extreme lighting are a payoff for how technically explicit the nude scenes are. I mean, you’re not going to get an A-list Hollywood actress who, as we’ve established, is already part of Disney’s Marvel Cinematic Universe as Black Widow, to do gaping pussy shots on screen unless you assure her that it’s totally artistic… not at all gratuitous… not at all meant to be sexually arousing.

That said, if you don’t find a close up of Scarlett Johansson’s pussy, surrounded by her neatly trimmed pubic hair, soft yet firm abs, and luscious thighs, sexually stimulating, then you’re truly one in a million. Again, gay men and straight women are not exempt from this. I’m not going to do a full run down of each of her nude scenes in Under The Skin, except to say that she doesn’t have any sex scenes, which is ironic considering the movie is all about luring unsuspecting Scottish neds into her van with the implication of them getting sex somewhere along the way. Then again, I suppose that was meant to be the subversion. Whatever. Either way, the naked scenes by and large involve non-sexual nudity, which I’ve always found makes for a more sublime fapping experience.

Let’s quickly address other films and characters where you might hope to see a naked Scarlett Johansson. Black Widow? The character everyone loves, for sure, but Disney actresses only go nude outside of their contracts, so that’s an obvious no-go. One of her early roles was in A Love Song for Bobby Long, wherein at the tender age of 19, she was cradling some majestic sideboob to flash for the camera. As you’ve probably guessed, there is no nipple visible, even if we do get a massive look at her massive right breast. Vicky Cristina Barcelona has some great cleavage as she’s topless in a bed, and while her tits look phenomenal, again, no nipples appear. Next, a skinny dipping scene in He’s Just Not That Into You. Tons of people swear they saw a flash of nip here as she bobs up and down in the swimming pool, but I’ve not scrubbed through the frames myself to confirm. She has a sex scene in Don Jon, but you pretty much see nothing, so that one’s a wash too.

Outside of film, the Scarlett Johansson leaked nude photos were what they were, but a lot of people felt it immoral to fap to those personal pictures. As for the ones that didn’t find it immoral, the Fappening showed us all something very interesting, which is that Hollywood millionaires just cannot afford phones with even halfway decent cameras. One last dishonorable mention goes to her role in Ghost in the Shell, in which all of her nudity is obscured by a body suit, even when she is literally meant to be completely naked. Yes, I am enough of a weeb to know that Major was always a machine (in that body anyway), but the Major in the anime had nipples, android or not, and Scarlett Johansson has nipples too, which has been proven to us courtesy of Under The Skin. I’m just saying it would have fit together nicely, but Hollywood decided to aim this adaptation at preteens, so we’re robbed once again.

Anywho, for all that’s wrong with the world of celebrity nudity, one thing that went right, albeit with a spot or ten of color correction, is Under The Skin. So from that gem of Scottish cinema, enjoy Scarlett Johansson nude.