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Holly Willoughby Naked – Ministry of Mayhem – 4K-ish Upscale from VHS

It’s easy to assume you would never have the opportunity to see Holly Willoughby naked. After all, she doesn’t really do much acting, she doesn’t do many lewd online postings, she doesn’t have an OnlyFans (yet), so where would you see her naked body? The answer is obviously ITV’s children’s Saturday Morning Show, Ministry of Mayhem. Yes, that one. I was going to type that it goes without saying that we weren’t supposed to get a Holly Willoughby nude shot in the show, but with some of the stuff I’ve seen on Ministry of Mayhem, I’m convinced that the producers catered more to coomers than children.

Holly actually occupies a very interesting niche in the nudity ecosystem. Although she doesn’t get naked a lot – or, like, ever – she is the queen of suggestiveness and tease. But here’s the funny thing: I’m not sure that she does it intentionally. Even now, hosting another of ITV’s morning shows, This Morning, with famed sex god Phillip Schofield, she seems to cultivate that innocent MILF aura that I can’t quite figure out the sincerity of. It’s clearly working, because any attempt to find nudes of Holly on the internet will lead you to reams upon reams of fakes, which should be every fapper’s worst nightmare, though desperate times have clearly called for desperate measures.

But if you want to actually see the real Holly Willoughby nude, Ministry of Mayhem remains the only place to do so. This clip dates back to June 26, 2004 – a fateful Saturday morning like no other. For if you were watching the morning kids show on ITV, you would have seen the voluptuous presenter stand up to do a dance, bounce around a bit, have her bounce desynchronize with one of her boobs’ bounce, and said boob fall out of her top. Depending on how much attention you were paying and how big your TV was, you might even have missed it. Fortunately for you, noble fappers who enjoy rewinding lewd Holly clips captured the moment on VHS, and it lives on to this day.

An unsurprising phenomenon, considering Ministry of Mayhem had a number of Holly Willoughby bikini moments, usually dripping wet, often covered with slime, or as they call it on the show, “gunge.” But that’s hardly all. No, no, there are tons of moments with with Holly in racy and suggestive outfits. In this very same episode with her wardrobe malfunction, she does one of her infamous segments as Polly with the Trolley, in which she wears a French maid outfit. But not only does she wear this incredibly erotic outfit, the skirt of it is so short that her ass is almost showing, thighs obviously completely exposed, and the camera even trails behind her as she walks on the stage and films her from below. From below!

ITV must have known what they were doing. Their wardrobe department certainly knew what they were doing when they had their young, attractive presenter wear that nipslip-guaranteeing top and no bra underneath AND have her do a bouncy dance. Somewhere, a producer knew that they were going to get Holly Willoughby naked on camera, and they did their bit. Some men’s greatness just cannot be measured. Holly herself has said on interview how embarrassing the situation was for her, to which co-host Stephen Mulhern “joked” that their rating went up hard after that. I’m sure lots of things went up hard that morning. But that’s enough of that. Enjoy the lovely Holly Willoughby nude like you’ve never seen her below.

Bonus Round!

Daisy Waterstone Naked – Milky’s Immortality – HD Stream

We never got to see Daisy Waterstone naked while she was playing Margo in The Durrells of Corfu… except we kind of did. In fact, we got to see sweet Margo Durrell naked precisely while that show was airing. No, you didn’t miss it. The show didn’t give us an actual Margo Durrell nude scene, although that definitely would have spiced it up, but we did get to see Daisy Waterstone nude in another production that was released shortly after the second season of The Durrells finished. I’m talking about the web short, Milky’s Immortality. This is listed by the creator as the first part of the Milky Slips Time Trilogy. Sadly, we still have not seen the rest, but I’m looking forward to it, especially if both Daisy and the wardrobe department return intact.

Milky’s Immortality is a tale about quantum suicide and quantum immortality. If that sounds really heavy, you’ll be surprised to learn that it’s not. A surprisingly jaunty short which is no doubt helped by Margo Durrell’s bouncing tits pretty much opening it. Perhaps one of my favorite things about it is how well concealed it is. With less than 18,000 views as I write, I really feel like I’ve uncovered some sort of hidden treasure. Yes, it’s true that our English Rose has more credits in shorts than anything else, but even so, those are more mainstream, more marketed, more widely listed. Milky’s Immortality is like an unassuming side shop in the back alleys of a Moroccan market, but when you step through its threshold, you behold wonders the world has never seen… namely Daisy Waterstone’s breasts.

The funny thing is that there’s one place that we didn’t get to see Daisy Waterstone nude, and that’s in BBC’s Silent Witness. My God, BBC comes up a lot along my travels. It almost makes paying for TV License in the United Kingdom an honor, knowing that you’re funding so many nude scenes. And Silent Witness really does do that. Just off the top of my head, the show has the only nude scene by Daisy Ridley, who of course gained fame by playing Rey, Jar Jar Binks’ sex slave in the Star Wars sequels. Silent Witness also contains the only proper nude scene by Jodie Comer. That girl’s always got hair covering her tits in every other nude scene, but not Silent Witness. Incidentally, both playing corpses during their nude scenes. In fact, most of the nude scenes in Silent Witness are of corpses. I guess someone’s got to cater to the necrophile market.

As for contextualizing why we see Daisy Waterstone topless in Milky’s Immortality, it’s because she needs to commit suicide to travel to another dimension. We obviously all know that you have to be naked when you commit suicide, but panties are allowed if you do it by drinking dishwashing liquid. So she takes a gulp and then starts sputtering and throwing it up. If any of you fappers are into gag porn or something, you are in for a treat. I have to give mad respect to the director here for keeping the camera on her front, keeping the lights on bright, and not having any annoying props covering up the good bits. Your service will be honored for generations to come, sir.

We then get a magnificent view of Daisy Waterstone’s ass and hanging sideboob – or maybe it’s more of a hanging underboob – as she crawls across the room on the floor. She reaches the end of the room, at which point she rolls over onto her back. The camera operator then takes the opportunity to get a nice, long, lingering look at her naked body from the top as she lies dead. You know, as I’m writing this, I’m wondering whether this was actually an undercover Silent Witness episode. The coincidences are just too many. No, I take it back. Silent Witness nude scenes usually have terrible angles, whereas in Milky’s Immortality, we truly get the best seats in the house. Enjoy the screenshots of Daisy Waterstone nude.

Lily-Rose Depp Naked – Wolf – 4K Stream

I love a good nude debut, which is why today we’ve got Lily-Rose Depp naked in Wolf. In it, she plays a catgirl. Yes, anime is now real. Or, if you want to look at it from a less appealing perspective, you can say that she starred in a furry porn. Strangely, I’m not even complaining. Considering how shy she’s been about getting naked on screen, I’ll take any nudity from her, no matter the level of aberration. And we do get some damn good views here.

This is significant since the only other film one could say that we see Lily-Rose Depp naked in, she is technically topless, but she’s covering her boobs with her hands. That’s not to say you can’t squeeze a desperate fap out of it. She does look absolutely magnificent as she backpedals with a cheeky shy smile on her face and no clothes. But now, we don’t need to anymore. If you’re one of those masochists that likes the tease, the movie in question is A Faithful Man, or as it’s known in French, L’homme fidèle. I hope you like subtitles.

So as we can see, Wolf remains the only movie to host a proper Lily-Rose Depp nude scene. Or three. It’s a matter of perspective. They all sort of follow one another. In the first instance, her character, the girl who thinks she’s a cat, draws cat whiskers on her face and goes to see her boyfriend, the wolf, who’s chained up and in a cage. She then takes her clothes off, as everyone does when in this exact situation. We get some sideboob action, but unfortunately, the scene is quite dark, and even with color correction, it’s not the most graphic of scenes.

This is made up for in the next scene, where we see Lily-Rose Depp topless while she’s lying on her back. Her nipples are hard as diamonds as she holds dogboy’s hand while they sleep together naked. It’s not completely clear whether an off-screen sex scene occurred or not. The prison bars don’t really seem like that much of an impediment unless the guy in the movie thinks he’s a wolf because he’s hung like one. Lily-Rose is a bit out of focus in this scene, sadly, but the camera pans up and then down again, during which she sits up and comes slightly more into focus.

The final scene is my favorite, and unless she does a full frontal any time soon, will likely remain the best Lily-Rose Depp nude scene for a long time. She’s naked and sitting in a bathtub, but check this out: The camera is still, she’s not moving, her tits are in perfect view, there’s nothing in the way, the lighting is perfect, and the scene even lasts a whole lot of seconds. It’s unusual for me to edit a scene that requires so little color correction for maximum fappability. So there you have it. If you can get past the fact that she looks like her dad Johnny Depp in the face – or alternatively, if you like imagining Johnny Depp with boobs – enjoy Lily-Rose Depp naked in Wolf.

Eli Jane Naked – The Way – HD Stream

If you’re wondering whether The Way is the only film in which you can see Eli Jane naked, the answer is no… but really yes. Technically, her titties appear for about a second in The Telling, a 2009 film that I haven’t watched, but from what I know about it, seems like it shouldn’t exist. So what’s the problem? Well, we don’t really see Eli Jane’s face in that movie. No, she doesn’t play an extra. Worse. Her role was as a body double for Bridget Marquardt. Yes, that Bridget Marquardt. Why someone who’s job it is to get completely naked for every photoshoot needs a body double is a conundrum I’ve not been able to unravel, but here we are anyway.

I suppose with prior renowned roles as “Café Waitress,” “Bank teller,” and “Girlfriend,” it’s not difficult to see why doing a nude scene without face and name recognition became a viable option, although to be fair, the last of those mentioned roles was in the music video for Leona Lewis’ Bleeding Love. Said music video was also her second role of all time, the first being as Axis Sally in the TV ad for Brothers in Arms: Hell’s Highway. This eclectic selection of roles is rounded off by the music video for Alice in Chains’ Hollow. Just to be clear, I’m not mocking her career. OK, I am, but I’m not mocking her. On the contrary, I thought her performance in The Way was really good and showed lots of range.

Another thing it showed was a whole lot of Eli Jane nude. I don’t mean in terms of time or quantity of scenes; there were only two of them, and they were quite short. I’m talking more in terms of square inches of skin shown. Now, I don’t know what the number actually is, but I know it’s equivalent to every square inch she has. Yes, in her first nude scene, Eli Jane is completely naked. Full frontal, boobs, ass, legs (if you’re a time traveller from the 1940s), feet (if you’re one of those people) – whatever you want to see, the movie’s got you covered. In the scene, her character, Jane Arcs, a death row inmate with a heart of gold, gets strip searched before her execution because… reasons. Not gonna lie, I’m a bit peeved that there are prison bars between her and the camera, but nothing is concealed throughout, so it’s ignorable.

Later in the film, there’s an Eli Jane sex scene between her character and a prison officer who is also her boyfriend on the sly. No full frontal this time, but we do get a nice close shot of her sideboob across a broad range of arm configurations, which is actually quite important in what angle and shape of boob you get to see. Also, there are no metal bars in the way this time. The scene is a bit dark, but with the eternal magic of color correction, I’ve gotten the material to where it needs to be for visibility.

I do have to say, the setting of the prison, strip search, jailhouse catfights – they all evoke a much earlier era, one where women in prison films were significantly more commonplace. I mean, all this movie was missing was for a fight to happen in the showers, or indeed any shower scene, but on the whole, I am glad to see the women in prison genre slowly coming back. Hopefully we get more offering in the near future, and if they’re from other Iranian directors, then no complaints from me. The Way does not, as I write, have a blu ray release, so in the meantime, enjoy the screencaps from the HD stream of the Eli Jane nude scenes from the film below.

Bethany Orr Naked – Excess Flesh – Blu ray

As I write, there’s only one film in which we can see Bethany Orr naked, and this is it. Excess Flesh is a sweet and delightful little psychological thriller, the virtues of which I extolled when I covered the scenes in which we see co-star Mary Loveless naked. In the interest of brevity, I won’t be repeating what I’d said in that post, so either go read that (and fap to Mary Loveless while you do) or simply watch the movie, which, if you enjoy the genre at all, is a pretty damn good watch, with or without the revolving door of nude scenes in it.

I’m going to just plop here, to clear any confusion nice and early, that the lovely and talented actress is also known as Effie Lavore, which she goes by in social media and the like. In all her projects to date, she has been credited as Bethany Orr, except for her earliest projects, where she was credited as B. Love Orr. For those struggling to make the connection, her full name is Bethany Love Orr, so Lavore is a phonetic truncation for her Love and Orr. I’ll be referring to her as Bethany Orr in this article not out of disrespect, but purely because that’s what she’s credited as in the movie this is covering. My gratitude goes out to the gentlemen and scholars over at IMDB for collating all of this information, meaning I could spend less time researching and therefore more time fapping, as God intended.

With the exception of the first nude scene, one quite early in the movie, you do have to strain your eyes a bit to properly catch Bethany Orr naked in it. Not unlike with the Mary Loveless nude scenes, the nudity in Excess Flesh isn’t especially gratuitous. I rarely say this because in 99% of films, it’s simply untrue, but in Excess Flesh, the nudity seems to genuinely be for artistic purpose rather than solely to sell tickets and blu rays. That said, director Patrick Kennelly has only included naked actors in one of his other projects, a music video, and… well, let’s just say that to call it gratuitous would be like calling Death Valley, California warm. If you’re interested, the full, uncensored video is up on Vimeo (it contains a lot of peepee; you’ve been warned).

Back to the Bethany Orr nude scenes, the first one appears about 6 minutes into the film, when her character Jill goes to weigh herself in her bathroom. Desperate to get that number as low as possible, she undresses before stepping onto the scale, leaving herself naked save for a pair of pink dotted panties with an adorable little bow. This is the most gratuitous of the nude scenes in the film and arguably the only one in which we get a long(ish), clear(ish), uninterrupted(ish) look at the good stuff. So get your faps in early, I guess.

After this first time we see Bethany Orr topless, the rest of the scenes are more dependent on some good old-fashioned video scrubbing to catch the money shots. The next time we see Bethany Orr nude, she actually is completely naked, and to be fair, a very large proportion of her shaved crotch gets screen time. If she didn’t go for the Brazilian wax/shave, there would certainly be a lot of bush on screen. Because she does, however, there’s no bush and no actual definable pussy lips visible, which in a way is the worst of both worlds. Still squeezed in a good fap to her upper crotch skin, though, and you can too if you try hard enough.

In what is the last nude scene of the film – and, quite poetically, extremely close to the end, like the first one was extremely close to the beginning – we get a lovely helping of Bethany Orr’s sideboob as she rampages around a kitchen. But wait, one does not rampage around a kitchen before cutting up one’s top, of course. So having done that, what’s left of her top often exposes her right boob as she flails around in a feast of nip slips to make even the Super Bowl proud (or explosively enraged; I forget what their reaction was).

So for those of you who can’t be bothered to scrub through the video for the nip flashes, Fapsmith has scrubbed for your sins, and you can enjoy the sacred moments of Bethany Orr nude – or, if you prefer, Effie Lavore nude – below.