2000s Nude Scenes in Film and Television - Page 5

Christina Ricci Naked – After.Life – Blu ray

Watching Christina Ricci naked in movies was one of the things that made the first decade of the new millennium worth living. Indeed, when I think of the 00s, I think of nu metal, three quarter shorts, and Christina Ricci nude on the television screen – DVD if you were lucky; VHS otherwise. Anyone that has been following (and fapping to) her career knows that we have since been blessed with blu ray releases of even some of her earlier work, which meant enjoying the nudity in crisp high definition. I can tell you for free that teenage me would have probably died of bliss if someone told him that in a decade, all of his favorite nude scenes would start getting full HD releases. Of course, we’re at the stage now when full HD nudity is becoming the minimum acceptable standard and what is currently accepted as the impressive resolution is 4K ultra HD 2160p. Truly the relentless march of technology.

There is a bit of a dark side to it all, though. Sure, it starts off with borderline-innocent (but more borderline than innocent) stories of a barely legal Christina partying with an even younger Gaby Hoffman and Courtney Love (yes, the Courtney Love of playing-guitar-naked-on-stage fame) and being dragged by the latter to casinos and strip clubs. Then you get to the darker stuff like not getting the lead roles during the romantic comedy era because she was typecast as the emotionally dead – or, in the case of this film, literally dead – goth girl that exists to get naked. The New York Times article even appears to confirm that Christina Ricci had breast reduction surgery at the age of 19 “because she couldn’t stand the way people talked about her body.” This is certainly news to me since for the bulk of her adult career, the Santa Monica-born actress has denied multiple times ever having plastic surgery to make her boobs smaller, or so the meme goes. People have certainly been guessing that she’s had a boob job (anti-boob job?) for ages. I guess your tits can only shrink so much before people start being suspicious that it’s not weight loss alone causing it.

Even so, this seems not to have distracted from the cornucopia of Christina Ricci nude scenes, which continue to carry legends of their own. In a very recent episode of Variety’s Actors on Actors, the actress told Sydney Sweeney of a movie in which she was pretty much naked for the entire time and remained naked between shots of nude scenes. Something about looping the awkwardness all the way around to being not awkward again, a set of experiences which the Independent have linked quite appropriately to a more direct interview with the Euphoria actress. In the Variety interview, Christina Ricci doesn’t actually say which movie she is talking about. Some commenters have assumed that the movie in question is Black Snake Moan. I can understand why. It’s one of my favorite movies to beat my meat to… I mean to enjoy the natural beauty of the human form… to. But I have another theory. I’m a lot more confident that the movie in question, the one in which Christina Ricci was naked through much of the shooting, was none other than After.Life.

Everyone knows all about the endless scenes in Black Snake Moan of Christina Ricci, sexy in a Confederate crop top and daisy dukes, or even just the crop top and a pair of stained white panties… or even just the white panties and a heavy metal chain. And there were nude scenes in that too. Oh good Lord, were there nude scenes in Black Snake Moan. But you see, the reason I thought that didn’t fit with her description in the interview is because in that movie, she is dressed in very skimpy, barely-there clothing for just about the entirety of the film, but she’s only actually naked for short bursts of it. So flip the calendar forward two years to 2009, and you have a very different movie that did not get quite as much fanfare. I’m of course once again talking about the psychological horror-thriller tittysploitation film that is After.Life.

After.Life starts with a Christina Ricci sex scene and the kind of gratuitous, in-your-face nudity in that pretty much sets the stage for the rest of it. Man, do we see a lot of Christina Ricci nude in it. More to the point, for the entire sort of middle-to-end part of the movie, her character just does not wear clothes. Like, she’s completely nude throughout the whole part of the film. That situation begins, almost fetishistically, with Liam Neeson’s funeral home mortician-person-serial killer character cutting her flimsy red dress off with a pair of scissors while she lies on her back on a mortuary slab, exposing her naked body for a camera that does not attempt to hide much (other than her pussy, I’m sad to report).

Big props to the lighting team too, because if you thought seeing Christina Ricci boobs in a thematically dark movie about death meant literal shadows everywhere, you couldn’t be more wrong. In fact, she is so damn well lit, that it’s almost like those scenes were made solely for titillation purposes. But they totally weren’t. I know I always say that as a joke, but in this case, they actually weren’t. Why do I say this? Because After.Life was written and directed by Polish filmmaker Agnieszka Wojtowicz-Vosloo in what is, quite impressively, her debut offering. I have said it time and time again, and now I’m going to say it once more: I don’t understand why this is such a recurring theme – I well and truly cannot make sense of it – but women write and women direct many of the best nude scenes in film and television. If anyone has any insight into why this is, please do share, because it’s one of the most counterintuitive phenomena I’ve encountered in a very long time.

After.Life might actually also be the only film where you can see the heavenly sculpture that is Christina Ricci ass unburdened by any textiles. From Prozac Nation to Z and everything between, I can’t think of a single nude scene that she’s done that has her ass on display, so this one has to win bonus points for that at least. Before anyone makes an Addams Family comment (she was underage, so, like, don’t), Netflix and Tim Burton did indeed team up to revive the franchise, and Christina Ricci is actually in it, but not playing Wednesday Addams, apparently. She’s not playing Morticia either, who will be played by none other than Catherine Zeta-Jones, who seems to have the inhuman power of preventing any of her nude scenes from being released in formats that aren’t the most substandard of standard definition. You know who thankfully doesn’t have that power? Look through this gallery of Christina Ricci naked in After.Life and take a guess.

Dorothy Duffy Naked – The Magdalene Sisters – HD Stream

You are not only looking at the only source in existence that shows Dorothy Duffy naked. You are also looking at, as I write, the highest quality images of Dorothy Duffy naked in existence, and that will probably not change unless my humble efforts here start a revolution of color correcting among celeb nude scene sites internet-wide. Spoiler alert: It won’t. Only I am both obsessive and demented enough to put myself through this for free. If you don’t believe me, I invite you to go to Google Images, type in “dorothy duffy nude,” and look at the results. See? Told you. Not ego tripping. Just saying. OK, maybe I am ego tripping just a little bit.

>inb4 your color correction isnt that good

Speaking of color correction, if you’ve already seen and fapped to the posts dedicated to Eileen Walsh and Anne-Marie Duff, you may have noticed that the screen captures here look a little bit different, and I don’t mean just which frames are used and where they’re cropped from. One benefit of a lot of things happening between the last time I covered this scene and now is that when I got back to it today, I could look at it with a fresh pair of eyes. The bad news is that I wasn’t fully satisfied with what I saw. The good news is that I’ve gone ahead and touched the scene up a little bit. I’m happier with the new version, which will be used when I cover the post for Nora-Jane Noone. I’m not going to go back to recapture stills for the previous two posts because some might prefer that look, but for what it’s worth, between this post and Nora-Jane’s, it will likely cover most bases where the other actresses are on screen. Yes, you get to work for your ideal faps.

So why do we see Dorothy Duffy nude in The Magdalene Sisters? It’s a perfectly typical and ordinary nude scene where she is forced to strip until she is completely naked, made to run in place for a bit, made to listen to humiliating comments about her naked body, including being told to turn around so that she can be told she has the back of a bricklayer (I’d still rub your back, Dorothy), and other such joys. The Magdalene Sisters is a film that straddles the line between – or perhaps embraces both of – the nunsploitation genre and the women-in-prison genre, all while being targeted at men and women of very high class and culture… and fappers.

But really, if all you want is to watch a minute or two of Irish nude women lined up for inspection by a Catholic nun, this is your dream. Well, mine anyway. If you have any suggestions for similar, please do share. You know the usual ways to get in touch – the contact page, the official Twitter, and of course by dropping a comment below. If you were specifically after Dorothy Duffy, then you’ll be either pleased or disappointed, depending on perspective, to know that I wasn’t exaggerating when I said that this is the only footage we have of the Irish actress nude. There is a scene in Childer where Dorothy Duffy shifts around while taking a bath, and you think that just for a fraction of a second her boobs are flashed under the water. I’m sad to say that when scrubbing through frame by frame, you can see that she has some sort of modesty band or flesh-colored boob tube or something covering her nips. I’m even more sad to say that I spent that time scrubbing through a short frame by frame just so that I could potentially catch a blurry, obscured shot of nip. Where did life all go so wrong?

Anyway, wherever that happened, at least I’ve got a row of Irish naked women to fap to over and over again, and now so do you. Although, I did run into some uncertainty over whether Dorothy Duffy actually is Irish (as in Republic of Ireland) or not. An article from Donegal Daily mentioned that she is based in and grew up around County Donegal in Republic of Ireland, but her Wikipedia entry says she was born in Northern Ireland (United Kingdom, not Republic). Confusingly, the cited source for that, the Irish Times, doesn’t say anything about where she’s born, but it does mention her working in Belfast, Northern Ireland. Upon a ton of digging, I finally found a source for the answer that is as authoritative as can be. Dorothy has a profile on AdVoice that includes a spoken introduction where she describes herself as Irish, says she was born in Douglas Bridge, Northern Ireland, and that she moved to the Republic of Ireland at the age of five. I knew all those restraining orders I collected from excessive stalking would justify themselves one day. Enjoy Dorothy Duffy naked in the screen captures below.

Anne-Marie Duff Naked – The Magdalene Sisters – HD Stream

The Magdalene Sisters is not the only feature in which you can see Anne-Marie Duff naked. The most obvious other answer is the original Shameless, wherein she played the first season protagonist, Fiona Gallagher. If you’re confused right now because you always thought that it was Emmy Rossum who played Fiona Gallagher, remember that there are two version of the show. I mean, there are more, but the two most popular ones globally are the American one, in which Emmy Rossum gets her tits out as Fiona Gallagher, and the original British one, where Anne-Marie Duff’s Fiona has considerably less nudity.

But for the lack of Anne-Marie Duff nude scenes in Shameless, we have this amazing one in The Magdalene Sisters to make up for it. For those who didn’t read the earlier post covering Eileen Walsh’s nudity, The Magdalene Sisters is a highbrow Irish movie from the early 2000s that is at once a women in prison film, a nunsploitation film, and a serious Oscar bait drama about the horrific abuses that the Catholic Church in Ireland carried out against women who were deemed wayward, with reasons being given including having children out of wedlock, being mildly flirty and attractive, and preferring Heineken over Guinness.

One of the abuses, as dark as it is, does involve getting Anne-Marie Duff nude for the camera, so I suppose the suffering was not for nothing. Fappers everywhere thank the victims for their noble sacrifice. All four of the protagonists of the film and a number of other unfortunate women are forced to strip nude by the nuns for a reason that I’ve not quite yet been able to establish, but somehow this devolves into the nuns making a game out of ranking the nude inmates’ body parts. A number of prizes are given out. Anne-Marie Duff doesn’t win anything. It may or may not have something to do that I suspect that she was wearing a merkin for the scene. The reason I’m singling her out is that all of the other actresses’ bushes looked completely natural, which brought me much joy. Fiona Gallagher’s pussy hair, however, looked an odd shape. No taper to it whatsoever. Now, it is possible that it was just shaved that way, but that’s not a common way of doing it, so I’m leaning merkin, unfortunately.

Most of the shots of the London-born actress are frontal, but we do see some sideboob in the closing Anne-Marie Duff topless scene of her and the other girls getting dressed after they’re allowed to wear clothes again. It is only a few quick flashes, but with how perfectly lit, angled, and presented the full frontal nude shots were, I don’t really feel it would be fair to complain. Speaking of complaining, I hope we don’t have any ass men in the house, because in spite of how explicitly graphic the nudity is in this scene, not a single ass gets into frame. Maybe the filmmaker thought that would be crossing a line into the realm of the vulgar. Totally not what’s going on now, though. It’s all highbrow, remember.

So there you have it – Anne-Marie Duff in the full frontal nude scene that isn’t the only one she has done, but it certainly is the best. If the framing and position of watermarks in the images on this posts is harming your fap experience, remember that this one has been lovingly hand-crafter for Anne-Marie Duff’s naked body. If you want to get a more focused look on the other protagonists, there will be individual posts for Eileen Walsh, Dorothy Duffy, and Nora-Jane Noone. The below gallery is specifically to enjoy Anne-Marie Duff naked.

Eileen Walsh Naked – The Magdalene Sisters – HD Stream

With a career trajectory like she’s had, one wouldn’t expect there to be any scenes in existence with Eileen Walsh naked. And if one entertained the possibility, surely the last thing you would imagine is a scene of her standing completely nude, with her full bush on display, well lit, fully on show, alongside a bevy of other nude women. For this blessing, we have to thank Peter Mullan for writing and directing what is perhaps the most highbrow women in prison film in cinematic history, The Magdalene Sisters.

Now, I might be burying the lede somewhat with that description. The very obvious overabundance of nuns could also classify it as a nunsploitation film. Searching for intent is a losing game since the director certainly didn’t desire either of those descriptors. Nonetheless, the tropes are there. We’ve got sadistic people in charge of the institution where our protagonists are incarcerated, women and girls who should not be there but find themselves there anyway, gratuitous nudity involving humiliation and in groups – the tropes are all present. Whether you ascribe those more to the nunsploitation genre or the women in prison camp is, I suppose, up to you, but it is probably safe to say that both elements are prevalent.

So under what circumstances do we get to see Eileen Walsh nude in The Magdalene Sisters? Well, the whole thing is a bit dark, to be honest. The Irish actress plays the role of Crispina, a woman with what is very heavily implied to be a learning disability who ends up having a child out of wedlock. In 1960s Catholic Ireland, this is viewed as being ever-so-slightly undesirable, so she gets shipped off to an institute run by the Catholic church, where to atone for her sins and ensure entry into heaven, she does laundry and occasionally gets forced to suck the priest’s dick. No, that last part wasn’t an off-color joke on my part.

The full frontal nudity we get from Eileen Walsh happens over the span of about two-and-a-half minutes during a scene where the girls are, for a reason that was never really established (or that I was too zoned out to catch), being punished by being forced to stand in a line completely naked while the nuns make comments about their private parts. Crispina has to get told multiple times to move her hands away from her hairy pussy, which she does so dutifully and in full view of the camera. Bless. Her bravery pays off because the nuns award her (SPOILER ALERT!) the prize for the hairiest beaver on the spot. Although she certainly deserves it, sporting a regal au naturel bush of the finest standard (and no merkin trickery either), the character is distraught by this. In fact, the whole group of inmates find themselves quite distraught. Must be something to do with the forced nudity, sadistic public humiliation, and Ireland’s abysmal performance in the Olympics that year. Stay strong, Emerald Isle.

So there we have it – the only Eileen Walsh nude scene in existence, and depending on your perspective and proclivities, it’s either extremely unerotic or extremely erotic. If you find yourself in the former camp, boy do I have good news for you. Below are all the best screen captures, lovingly selected from the movie, so that you can have your fap without being disrupted by silly little stressors like context. If you look a few pixels to the left and right of her in the images, you will find that Eileen Walsh is flanked by a number of other fully nude actresses, including Dorothy Duffy, Nora-Jane Noone, and Anne-Marie Duff. If you think the screenshot selection and watermark placement is a bit disruptive to your abilities to fap to them properly, stop, roll it back, and check out their individual posts. Fapsmith takes every nude scene very seriously, and all those posts are designed for maximum fappability to that specific actress. Fap on, friends.

Jessica Biel Naked – Powder Blue – Blu ray

There has only been one movie with Jessica Biel naked, and that’s Powder Blue. I’m starting out with that fact because it’s a controversial stance, but I really don’t see it as such. Movies where she is technically naked but you don’t see anything don’t count in my books. The closest we get is the USA Network series The Sinner, wherein we see ass while she’s taking a shower as a police officer watches. It goes without saying, being an American network television show, no nipples are visible at any point. Even Easy Virtue, which had a scene with multiple pussy flashes from Kimberley Nixon, didn’t include any nude scenes from its main star.

So we come back to Powder Blue, a movie with the mouth-watering premise of Jessica Biel as a stripper. The strip club is featured multiple times, so in theory, we have many excuses to see Jessica Biel naked. Ironically, only one of the three nude scenes she does in the film is in the strip club, but there’s tons of footage of her in skimpy outfits and some borderline fetish gear, if that’s what you’re into. That’s about the end of the eroticism in the movie. The rest of her role is exceptionally depressing, to the point that I actually almost struggled to fap to her nude scenes. Almost. Got there in the end, though.

The first time we see Jessica Biel nude in Powder Blue is not the first time she does an exotic dance at the strip club. There’s at least one tease scene before that involving the aforementioned exposing clothing. The actual nude scene we got is the one that went down in history. She walks onto the stage in a black cape-robe-thing and flashes her ass a few times before taking it off (the cape, not her ass). The striptease then continues on for a little bit before she takes her top off. Now, at this stage, if it was your first time watching the movie, you might think that it’s just more tease because we see this from the back, but it’s not. The camera very quickly goes to the front, where we see Jessica Biel naked for the first time.

So you’re a film director and you have Jessica Biel topless in front of a camera. What do you have her do? The answer is obviously (apparently) to have her pour hot wax down her back and then splash more hot wax onto her bare breasts while creepy geezers watch. And because that didn’t meet the director’s quota for sexual fetishes, the next part has her realize her incredible shame, begin crying, and cover up her tits so that no one can see them… while on the stage at a strip club full of men with no other purpose to be there than to stare at her naked body. I found the scene reminiscent of the forced stripping and covering of private parts by Catherine Walker in A Dark Song, which I suspect scratched the same penis itch for a lot of coomers out there.

In two shorter scenes, we get to see Jessica Biel’s ass and her breasts again from the side as Eddie Redmayne pulls her shirt over her head before an off-screen sex scene. The aforementioned ass scene gives quite a decent shot for a nice amount of time, so you don’t even need to rely on the freeze frame. As one final point, each time the film has Jessica Biel naked, the shots are very dark and, in the case of the stripping scene, lit with an exceptionally red light. I’ve made an effort at color correcting it (and then some), but I suspect the whole thing was shot in digital since this resulted in considerable artifacts. Nonetheless, I believe it’s an improvement over the original, so enjoy Jessica Biel nude like you’ve never seen her before.