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Milly Alcock Naked – House of the Dragon – 4K Stream

Lesbians and gentlemen, we have finally seen Milly Alcock naked as Rhaenyra Targaryen. Episode 4 of House of the Dragon, titled King of the Narrow Sea, gave us the Milly Alcock nude scene we have all been waiting for. Just to be clear, this is such a momentous occasion that even mainstream media has been buzzing over it. Newsweek reported that the Australian actress told them her sex scene with Matt Smith was “interesting” and that she was “very comfortable” with it. This might sound like a nothing comment, but we’ll actually come back to it in a bit because it will be answering a question that everyone who watched the episode probably had – or certainly the cynics among us did. The Independent took a break from highbrow reporting of royal mourners to write two separate articles just to call Milly’s sex scenes in this episode gnarly and uncomfortable.

The New York Post mentioned the intimacy coordinator for the Milly Alcock sex scene with Matt Smith, which is another deceptively important piece of information that we’re going to touch on in a bit. The Metro had this piece that is literally just about the sex scenes in this episode hilariously juxtaposed with a memorial of the Queen in a banner across the top. Esquire had a piece about how “shocking” the incestuous sex scene was “for nearly everyone but the cast,” forgetting that anyone who has read the books knows that the Targaryens have a propensity toward incest. Also, putting aside fantasy worlds, uncle-niece marriages were incredibly common in our own middle ages, which the Song of Ice and Fire franchise has been based off of since A Game of Thrones came out in 1996, so the fling between Rhaenyra Targaryen and Daemon is… why the hell am I defending this? Jezebel had their own take on it, which was different to all of the others, if nothing else. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Milly Alcock nude as Rhaenyra Targaryen is something we actually got treated to twice in the episode (kind of). So, all of this talk about her sex scene with Matt Smith’s Daemon Targaryen is a bit of a red herring to the point where I’m not even sure why that’s the major story arc that all of the media outlets focused on. In that scene, two things happen. Or rather, two things don’t happen. Firstly, we do not see Rhaenyra Targaryen naked in it. Matt Smith does undress her, and we even see some pubic mound (full shave, by the way), but no boobs, ass, or pussy lips are visible. The second thing that does not happen is Rhaenyra and Daemon having sex. Yes, their “sex scene” is just a bit of heavy petting and some awkward kissing. Are you feeling aroused yet?

The great news is that mere minutes later, we do get to see Rhaenyra Targaryen nude when she has sex with her knight protector Ser Criston Cole à la Whitney Houston in The Bodyguard. If you haven’t watched the episode, Rhaenyra loses her virginity to him, and House of the Dragon completes its transformation into a late 90s/early 00s teen series. I’m being unkind. All of that blue balling across the first three episodes and the only proper nude scene from the show before this being from Sonoya Mizuno, I am satisfied that we got at least a few flashes of nip and even a frame or two of inner labia out of Milly.

There’s one last point I’d like to make about Milly Alcock’s sex scene with Matt Smith. During the undressing parts – or indeed during all of the shots where parts of her naked body are visible – her face is almost never in the same shot. My philosophy has always been that a continuous pattern of the actress’ face not appearing in the same shots as her body in a nude scene means that a body double is in play. That’s actually what I thought was going on with this scene when I watched it and again when I edited it. I now bring your attention to the points raised earlier about Milly saying she felt “very comfortable” with the sex scene with the Doctor Who actor and the intimacy coordinator specifically for the scene between the two. Unless all of that’s hot air, then that really was Milly Alcock naked in that first scene with Matt Smith. Most of the footage I captured is from the other scene, the one with Ser Criston Cole, which was considerably more graphic. Everything from both of those is down below, so enjoy Milly Alcock nude as Rhaenyra Targaryen from House of the Dragon.

Oh, by the way, spoiler alert.

Polly Walker Naked – Rome – Blu ray

It was about time to do a nice, beefy post, and what better topic to do it with than Polly Walker naked in HBO’s Rome? Yeah, shame on you if you thought that Fapsmith was going to make a habit out of phoning it in with lean posts of 5 second-long nude scenes. I obviously had the exact opposite to work with when going through Rome. The series itself has a cornucopia of nude scenes from a number of the actresses, but even when you drill it down, we got a variety of Polly Walker nude scenes split across four separate episodes, coming in at second place for the most amount of nudity in the series, losing only to her in-show daughter Octavia, played be Irish actress Kerry Condon.

It is actually a bit funny because I remember back when Rome came out in 2005, it did have a bit of a reputation for being a gratuitous nudity fest. Certainly a large part of that reputation was well-deserved. For instance, when color correcting for these very scenes in this post, I cam across something that may slip under your radars as you watch the videos above and certainly slipped under most people’s radars, my own included, when watching the show as it’s meant to be on TV. My rather aggressive color correction, however, brought it out nice and clear. I’m talking about Lee Boardman’s ballsack slapping Polly Walker’s bare ass during their sex scene. Seriously, this is practically hardcore porn-tier. Considering it is clear that neither actor is using a body double in any other part of the sex scene, it’s unlikely that that’s the case here.

I’m not complaining that a Polly Walker nude scene contains *gasp* Polly Walker nude. I just find it very weird that HBO had their actors actually have literal genital contact during the filming of what I can only assume is meant to be a simulated sex scene. And if it wasn’t simulated, than Rome is literally hardcore pornography. And yet, in retrospect, it all seems rather pared back. Admittedly, the show’s successors didn’t have this level of genital contact, but compare how frequent and graphic the nude scenes were in – to use the most extreme example – Starz’ Spartacus. Of course, Spartacus had what was to me a very huge issue, which is the incessant use of the most evil invention on the planet – the merkin. I love a good bush – I really do. A merkin is not a bush any more than a clay figurine of a boob is a boob.

That said, we should be thankful for just how much we got to see of Polly Walker topless in Rome. Aside from having an all natural bush in a cast of actresses with all natural bushes, although it may not have been Spartacus-tier, HBO’s Rome was still from an era when nudity in film and television wasn’t seen as so problematic. It’s no coincidence that I chose Spartacus to compare it to. Starz, the network that produced Spartacus, produced another series this year. I’m talking, of course, about Becoming Elizabeth. You remember Becoming Elizabeth? It’s that show that all but opened with the nude debut that everyone had been waiting for – that of Call the Midwife’s Nurse Jenny Lee, Jessica Raine. And then we never saw her nor anyone else naked again for the entire rest of the show.

Polly Walker’s boobs may have only appeared a handful of times – four, to be precise – but that’s three more than one, far more than the token nude appearance to reel viewers in and leave them blue balled. For those among you keeping score, the episodes in which we see Polly Walker naked are the pilot episode, it’s follow-up, then the next one, and episode six. Yeah, the first three episodes of HBO’s Rome all had Polly Walker nude scenes. At the end of that one, a lot of people, myself included, probably thought that it would be an episodely affair. Unfortunately, at that point, there was only one more on the horizon, and then no more. Not from Polly, at least. Plenty from her co-stars, of course.

And that was the last of the Polly Walker sex scenes in Rome. And no, I haven’t forgotten that an entire second season was released. That one just contains no more nudity from Atia of the Julii, even though she continues to be a central character. I’m quite upset by that because Polly Walker had gained a bit of weight between the filming of the two seasons, and oh man, she had filled up in all the best ways by Season 2. I was hoping we’d get to see those nice, big, juicy MILF titties, but alas, no such luck. Yeah, she has a bath scene in the third episode of the second season, but I scrubbed through it looking for a money shot, and with regret I have to report that none such shot exists. Season 2 of Rome did have less nudity overall than the first, but it’s especially disheartening that Polly Walker nude scenes dropped from 4 all the way down to a flat 0.

And so we find ourselves constrained solely to the first season for this post, but hey, if you find yourself looking very closely to Polly Walker’s ass in the scene where she walks out of the Roman bath, you might spot a little something that wasn’t that obvious in the original air that my color correction has brought out. There is something visible in her thigh gap. Because it’s obviously in very dark shadow regardless of how much I boost the luma, it’s unclear exactly where the pubic hair ends and the pussy lips begin, but what I’ve got can certainly help your imagination along. Well, that’s my megapost of the quarter done, so scroll down and enjoy Polly Walker naked in Rome.

Alison Brie Naked – Horse Girl – 4K Stream

When I decided to cover Alison Brie naked in Horse Girl, I knew I had to do something special. Those of you who are familiar with my work know that all of the nude scenes I post are color corrected through such a complex, multi-faceted process, that even calling it color correction belies the scope of the work that goes into them. With Horse Girl, however, I had another layer to add to that. I really struggled to find any captures of the nude scenes from Horse Girl in 4K Ultra HD anywhere on the internet. I found AI upscales of the scene where we see Alison Brie nude while walking through a craft store, but that’s just not the same thing. AI upscales do pull detail out of nowhere, meaning that any nudity you’re seeing isn’t fully part of the original naked body. That said, it seems to work better on stills, as evidenced by my own little hackjobs of Natalie Dormer and Emilia Clarke.

I’m not against an AI upscale from Full HD to Ultra HD for the Horse Girl nudes on principle alone. No, the main reason I find it objectionable is because the film is literally available in 4K resolution from Netflix without any upscaling tomfoolery. Since posting nude scenes from film and television like they’ve never been seen before is what I go for anyway, posting up Alison Brie naked in Horse Girl in Ultra HD 4k 2160p resolution for the first time just seems like the right thing to do. And then, naturally, all of my usual gamut of color correction went on top of that to make the nudity that much clearer and more fappable.

Horse Girl is actually not the first feature that we see Alison Brie nude in, although to be fair, it is the only other of two. The Community actress’ first nude scenes were in the Netflix series about women’s professional wrestling GLOW. I suppose it’s interesting that every time she’s been nude on screen it’s always been a Netflix feature, considering the streaming company is fairly cagey with nudity generally. Some of you are going to bring up the alleged Alison Brie nude scenes in Born from all the way back in 2007. There is some controversy about whether that was really her or a body double, which is always a question when you can’t see the actress’ face at the same time as you can see her tits, but there needn’t be. Alison Brie herself has confirmed in a tweet that they used not one but a whole two body doubles for her in Born.

Other than the leaks, which I’m not going to comment on, we do get a quick flash of Alison Brie boobs – or rather, a whole lot of boobs and a quick flash of nip – in her 2012 lingerie photoshoot with GQ. In it, she keeps on trying to pull Gillian Jacobs’ bra off, only to reveal a new one underneath. Alison’s nip does fall out in the process, though. Since that predates Horse Girl, GLOW, and the leaked nudes that shall not be mentioned (again), GQ are actually responsible for the first time we saw Alison Brie naked ever. Thanks, GQ. Gentlemen indeed.

Horse Girl actually contains an Alison Brie sex scene that gets forgotten so often, that even I did a double-take when I rewatched the movie recently and it came up. The other lewd scene, because she’s not completely naked, that people overlook is the one where she’s in a sweater and panties and pulls her sweater up to examine her bruises. We get some pretty sweet underboob there. The scene that everyone of course knows is included here below, which is where she has a moment of psychosis and walks out of a shower that may or may not be real through the floor of the store where she works while completely nude as the customers look on confused. She then snaps out of it, panics, and covers herself up with some fabric, which I can only assume her employer took out of her pay after she got abducted by aliens. Spoiler alert or something. Enjoy the gallery of Alison Brie nude in Horse Girl.

Tanaya Beatty Naked – Crimes of the Future – 4K Stream

I didn’t really expect to see Tanaya Beatty naked when I watched Crimes of the Future. I’d picked up the movie in 4K to see the Lea Seydoux nude scene. It’s not that I haven’t seen Lea naked in pretty much every other movie she’s done, and occasionally full frontal as well, but I’ve had a thing for her ever since I covered Farewell, My Queen back in the .NET days, and I wasn’t going to stop now. So imagine my surprise when I’m watching the movie and out of absolutely nowhere, Rachel Black from the Twilight Saga takes all of her clothes off and is rocking quite a delectable bush.

For those with more contemporary tastes in film and television, Tanaya Beatty played Avery the stripper in Yellowstone. The irony there, of course, being that even though her character is a stripper (like with marines, there’s no such thing as a former stripper), she never really has a nude scene in Yellowstone. There was that one shot where she takes her top off and the camera is kind of behind her, but sideboob without nipple is no sideboob at all. There’s a second layer of irony in that Paramount Network aren’t particularly shy about including nude scenes in the show, so who the hell knows what was behind this decision.

Maybe neither the actress nor the world were ready for a Tanaya Beatty nude scene. We do have Through Black Spruce, which the Canadian actress had both a starring role and a nude scene in, but the nudity in that one is so dark and obscured, that I’m not convinced that even a solid round of color correction can increase the fappability factor to acceptable levels. I guess most people who have been jonesing for it have been settling for searching for Tanaya Beatty bikini pictures on Google Images for their fix, but that is no longer necessary.

Not only do we see Tanaya Beatty topless in Crimes of the Future, but we see her completely nude as well. The full frontal part doesn’t last that long, but as she finishes undressing and walks up to a weird biomechanical surgery coffin thing (Cronenberg, lol), she flashes her hairy pussy for a solid handful of frames. For much of the rest of the scene, she’s reclining with her co-worker and potential lesbian lover, played by Nadia Litz, and it’s mostly tits we see, but if you’re one of those foot men, you’re in for a special treat here too. Curiously, no ass in this scene. Not even in the entire movie, I think. Anyway, enjoy Tanaya Beatty nude in Crimes of the Future below.

Maria Bello Naked – A History of Violence – Blu ray

The greatest gift that David Cronenberg ever bestowed upon humanity was Maria Bello naked in A History of Violence with the only full frontal nude scene of her career. Sure, there’s all of about two or three seconds of nudity, and if you happen to be watching it in a movie theater or even just on a TV without a pause function, it can definitely feel like a bit of a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it moment. If you happen to have the benefit of a pause button or, better yet, the software to scrub back and forth frame by frame, however, this nude scene is actually up there with the greats.

The movie actually goes through quite a lot of teases before we get there. If you’ve ever wanted to see Maria Bello dancing seductively in a cheerleader outfit and then mounting Aragorn, you’re in luck, but you may find yourself disappointed by the fact that there is no real visible nudity in that scene. Then there’s another sex scene later on where you think you may be seeing hints of ass, but it’s so tame and un-graphic that I didn’t even bother cutting it to scrub through with the light bumped up to see if there was anything there, because at those angles, it was always going to be little or nothing.

When we finally do get to this, the only full frontal Maria Bello nude scene in existence, it’s easy to disbelieve your eyes and wonder whether anything was actually in view, especially since the open robe she’s wearing covers her tits most of the time. It covers her classic bush almost none of the time, and because she keeps her pubic hair trimmed in all of the right places, even her pussy lips are visible if you look close enough. I’m talking about inner labia, gentlemen. Maria Bello is sort of the queen of quick flash nude scenes, so this one is quite par for the course with that regard, but a lot more graphic in that all the rest are topless only, whereas here, we get all the full frontal nudity we can fap to. The video above has been slowed down to quarter speed so you can get an idea of exactly what’s happening, but the really magical way to enjoy Maria Bello naked in A History of Violence is with the carefully curated freeze frames below.