Vintage Faptuary

Anyone who’s been fapping to nude scenes in film and television for a long time – or to be more specific, between 2012 and 2014 – will recognize the name of this site. With one difference: it used to be faptuary.net instead of .com.

Don’t bother checking the old domain. It’s currently being cybersquatted, and if anyone tries to direct you there, they’re not the real Fapsmith.

How do I know this? Because I am the real Fapsmith.

Yes, it’s true. I’ve come out of retirement. When I started the Faptuary back in the .net days, I did it because I was unsatisfied with the quality of nude scenes posted online. I knew better could be done, so I did my part to do so.

By the time I slowed down on that endeavor, the rest of the internet had caught up, and the Faptuary was but one among many. In fact, by 2014, the Faptuary was slipping into obsolescence with its inferior video delivery model. It’s funny how much can change in only two years.

I stopped working on it in 2014, and I let the hosting lapse in 2017.

In retrospect, this was a mistake. Not for my own sake, but for the internet’s. When I let the hosting lapse, traffic was still considerable. So even though I could see no purpose for a dinosaur like that, it’s clear that a lot of people around the world who wanted a good fap could.

I’m bringing back the Faptuary now because the accessibility and quality of celebrity nude scenes on the internet has regressed. The bitrate of the source material used has regressed, the effort put into color correction has regressed, the coverage of the scenes has regressed, and even though there are a million more sites doing it now, that is precisely one symptom of the problem rather than a rare positive – it’s become all about quantity over quality.

This is why I’ve donned my cape (that doubles as a fapping sock) to do a bit of uplifting in the celeb nudity fapping sphere, modernized my methods, integrated the skills I’ve improved over the past near-decade, and will hopefully leave a lot of fellas a lot more satisfied on their searches.

But that’s not what this page is about.

This page is about something mentioned earlier – that I hadn’t recognized the value, diminished though it was, of the original faptuary.net when I closed it down.

To atone for my sins, I’ll be painstakingly bringing it all back.

“How?” you ask. Easy. I’m a hoarder of cosmic proportions. I delete very little. All the original image and video files are still on one of my six million hard drives. Due to the difference in how the original video files were formatted (they’re longer and have sound), I’ll have to fiddle with a way to host them, but the plan is to have them integrated in the original posts eventually, though when that will be is anyone’s guess.

That said, the original posts with the original images (updated watermarks and color correction, of course) and the original cringe-inducing text (at least that hasn’t changed with the revival) will be making a return post-haste, not visible on the home page, but safely filed and easily found under the NET category.

I hope you enjoy the old posts as much as I enjoyed making them.

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.

Below is a list of what’s been resurrected thus far: